23yo

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(Source: alxbngala, via soytuangelrosa)

starbuckhan:

andsoshedancedanddanced:

bitchesrideinmydeathstar:

lmao. paper-gold

LOL. ALL OF THESE. LOL.

GENIUS!

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andrewthepoet:

One time I went on a date to the Olive Garden and I ordered the seafood pasta. I open up one of the muscle oyster things and low and behold there is a tiny crab in there. I freak out and think it’s the craziest thing ever. I keep talking to my then girlfriend about this tiny crab. How hilariously wonderful it is that the little dude crawled in there in the ocean only to become a freaky little part of my pasta. She is very unamused and clearly wants me to shut the hell up about this tiny crab and be a normal person. She is 0% excited about the tiny crab. 
The waitress comes over eventually and is like ‘hey how’s the meal?’ and I’m like ‘awesome, but you gotta check this out! i found a tiny crab in here!’ and waitress freaks out and thinks its awesome. And she is like ‘can I take this to show everyone else?’ and I’m all like ‘hells yeah.’ So she does and everyone else that works there thinks it’s awesome.
Girlfriend SUPER annoyed.
The End.

cunttrip:

zestyy:

this version thoOoo

i dont know how to feel

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Anonymous asked: Eres mi crush

okok

4gifs:

Google’s Street View car is a jerk